Tonight was a milestone in the Brown household. Ben had his Christmas program for school tonight. His program started at 7pm and we left just after 6pm to make sure that we would get there in time. The snow and traffic was horrible..and it took us over an hour to get to the church for the program. I was so worried because I had a feeling that this night was going to be really good for Ben. We made it in time, his class had not gone on yet.
For most children this is always a wonderful experience. But for us until tonight, these programs have been always unpredictable because Ben has serious anxiety about these type of events. The first year of Preschool was horrible with programs...see my post from
May 2008. Last Christmas was somewhat successful, but Earle and I had to hide from him to stop him from spotting us and running off of the stage in a screaming fit of anxiety. He made it though last year, but was scared and upset afterward because he did not know where we had been. Today he told me he was going to do it...yesterday he sang one of his songs for me all the way through every verse. It does not seem like two songs would be so significant, but tonight they were...just enough time to show how much my little boy is growing up and changing. I am not saying that he was not scared tonight...I think he was, but he was also excited..
This is before the concert, you can see he is fidgeting with his hands...but
proud and smiling because he knows he is going to go through with it.
Our pictures did not turn out well at all, we were far away and the lighting was difficult. I was so disappointed about it, but it still gives you an idea.
Here he is, actually up there in front of hundreds of parents and kids...smiling and getting ready to sing.
After the songs were over, there was applause...this cracks me up because he is holding his ears...he said the applause were too loud...but that is a good thing!!
Afterwards the boys sitting down in the lobby watching the video of the performance...you can see he is still excited/nervous...fidgeting with his mouth and hands.
But you know what, he did it!!! This is a first for Ben and a huge step in his confidence. For once tonight I was the one who got teary eyed, not Earle, and it was all over two silly Christmas songs. I cannot tell you how proud I am of this kid. And also for his teachers this year who have helped him so much!!
CB